awake.

It’s been months since I last laid awake
allowing you to crawl inside my brain.

but here I am again
lost with you, in my mind
on yet another sleepless night.

I let my guard down yesterday.
read an old text you’d sent thinking I’d be fine
but I’m not.
thoughts of you infiltrate my brain
and I can’t shut them out.

why can’t I move on and let you go?
keep living life pretending I’m not alone?

you always get under my skin.
but I can’t let you in again.
need to reclaim my sanity.

you were the one that got away.
said you loved me
then made your great escape.
over and over you swore you’d never leave.
yet another promise you couldn’t keep.

I thought we were forever
but it didn’t work out that way

I know you really meant it
and wanted to stay.
but I fought your love until you went away.

It’s been over two years now.
you’ve moved on
but I’m still lonely and all alone.
because you held me so tight
and then you let me go.